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The other day I received a private message from a moderator (didn't know about that feature). On the margin of the message I could read the following sentence:

Our goal is to amicably resolve issues in a constructive way through direct communication.

Looks good and there's not much to say about that. However, in my case that was utter mockery, because to message was only to notify that I was banned. Now hold your breath: I don not seek here any wisdom or explanation on this ban etc. I would like to ask a question which is useful for future reference to users and even more so to moderators.

My question is the following one. What is meant by "amicable solution of issues"? Are there guidelines, or is there a code of conduct or a code of good practice?

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    Just to clarify, there's a difference between "suspension" and "ban". If you're away for a day or a week, that's merely a suspension, and is nowhere near as harsh as a ban :) (Of course if you're quoting said message, then I don't know). – Mark Mayo♦ Sep 10 '13 at 0:03
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    The word "amicably" is a very fancy word for "friendly". – Andrew Grimm Sep 10 '13 at 0:34
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    FWIW the message is a canned response template to a certain suspension reason, and those are written by SE staff (and I imagine SE community). The message text was not changed by Travel-SE mods in this instance. – mindcorrosive Sep 10 '13 at 6:09
  • @mindcorrosive frustratingly the only other reference I can find to the text was in a now-deleted message that I found a link to from one of the other chat rooms - one page down(!) (yay google). But yeah, same text there too. – Mark Mayo♦ Sep 10 '13 at 6:41
  • @AndrewGrimm Indeed. I am a friendly person. I haven't insulted anyone. Nor did I make refetence to Nazis or other ugly things. Because I am a friendly person, i have asked this question – user3470 Sep 10 '13 at 8:06
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Without seeing the rest of the message it's hard to know if it's in context, and certainly it doesn't appear (to me) to be "utter mockery" as you've presented it, but like I said, we can't see the context.

As for what guidelines are expected from users, there's a section in the help on behaviour, which presumably if everyone followed, would cause most 'issues' to be resolved. These guidelines include being honest, nice, clear, respectful and never rude, among other stuff, the reading of which I'll leave up to readers, rather than quoting the whole page, in case it gets updated in future.

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  • This does not really answer my question. It is not about behaviour of users but abou this precise procedure – user3470 Sep 10 '13 at 8:08
  • I think this is a comment and I have flagged it accordingly. – user3470 Sep 10 '13 at 8:09
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    ? You asked if there was a code of conduct or good practice or guidelines. There are, and I linked to them... – Mark Mayo♦ Sep 10 '13 at 9:12
  • Flags are for "serious problems" or "moderator attention" according to the tooltip that pops up when I hover over that link. Which of these is "accordingly"? \-: – hippietrail Sep 10 '13 at 13:13
  • The "not an answer" flag. That's what it is for. I have already used it in the past for similar situations and the moderators have never complained about it ... Many of these flags were accepted – user3470 Sep 10 '13 at 13:21
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    not an answer != not an answer I like – mindcorrosive Sep 10 '13 at 14:30
  • That sounds pretty subjective. Anyway, if you don't like an answer you can easily get rid of it. As a moderator you have plenty of tools at your disposal. – user3470 Sep 10 '13 at 16:44
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Let me start with the disclaimer that what follows is my personal opinion and by no means the opinion of "this site".

I usually try to solve personal issues on an online platform by ignoring it. When things get emotional on written text, it is really hard to get it out. The best way is usually a personal meeting, which will not work here. Hence, it is better to ignore issues. The platform is about traveling, which in turn attracts people with various cultural biases on what is considered "amicably solving issues". Lets not forget the focus we all seem to like and that is traveling. So lets set cultural differences aside and focus on just that. This might mean that some would consider poster printing in Paris while traveling there for a conference, not travel related. So be it. It is not worth debating about. There are a multitude of other platform which are equally good as this platform. So if I don't get an answer here I just dive in to the rest of the Internet.

Also remember while feeling offended or unjustly treated, nobody providing content here, is getting anything for it in return. The same applies to moderators who just do it in their spare time. It is altruism all the way and in the end you've got to crack a few eggs to make an omelette.

My rule would be don't fuzz on the lost eggs, but enjoy the omelette.

If you really need a set of "rules" you might want to adapt to the british way of saying things. Below are some examples from the linked article: debating

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  • If I may put it in Mark Mayo's words "Not quite what I had expected" ... – user3470 Sep 10 '13 at 12:26
  • But otherwise ok as a comment – user3470 Sep 10 '13 at 12:27
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    While I don't mind being quoted when it's something I actually said, when did I say those words?? – Mark Mayo♦ Sep 10 '13 at 14:40
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    @MarkMayo is becoming a sort of Chuck Norris of travel.SE! – Geeo Sep 10 '13 at 15:01
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    @user3470 I hear what you say and with the greatest respect I will bear it in mind. – user141 Sep 10 '13 at 15:14
  • @Andra wins. Flawless victory. (Mortal Kombat theme starts here) – Geeo Sep 10 '13 at 18:07
  • I am not here to win or to loose – user3470 Sep 11 '13 at 17:54
  • no one said you lost, @Andra just beated a solitaire. – Geeo Sep 12 '13 at 19:05

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